- Gearóid Farrelly: Comedian, writer and actor
- Zainab Boladale: Presenter, journalist, and author
- Maria Walsh: MEP for the Midlands-North-West constituency and a member of Fine Gael
- Laylah Beattie: Podcaster, theatre maker, writer
- Evin Dennehy: Drag artist (Candy Warhol) and founder of drag house Mockie Ah!
There were no other gay comics on the scene when I started; I was very nervous about that and then realised that nobody really cared. This would’ve been, say, 2008. I found that really heartening.
Then, in 2015, I was astonished that there was actual vocal resistance. I felt the marriage referendum was bringing this out and we were legitimising the worst parts of people.
The morning after the marriage referendum, I remember a tweet [saying] we’d secured marriage equality, but now we needed trans rights. And the immediate reply was “No”.
I’d never seen such opposition to trans. Literally, the lens moved. I feel that’s what’s happening now. I think the human race always needs a scapegoat.
There was a misconception that “marriage equality has come in, now everything’s perfect”, and that’s not the case.
If we have a news story, say, about our drag show in Cork, you’re seeing Mary or Joe from down the road saying the most horrific things. Ten years ago, they wouldn’t have had a platform. You’re wondering, has that always been there?
But then, when we travel to the most rural places in Ireland, we get a gorgeous reception. So what is happening? Is it that the negative people are far louder than the positive people, and is there a big group of people in the middle who just don’t speak up enough?
I think, in the past 10 years, LGBTI+ people as a whole, particularly our trans community, have been used as a political whack-a-mole, [creating an] ‘us and them’.
I think there are some phenomenal people out there living in rural and urban areas across Ireland, across the world, who really don’t give a shit who you sleep with.
[They care about] how you show up as an individual in your community, be that through organised religion or a volunteer group; or are you nice to people at the drop-off point with your kid?
Are you a pleasant colleague, and are you exercised for those who are not at the table?
Equality’s hard fought and very quickly lost. We have become complacent as a community.
Marriage equality ticked a box. But legally, in the world that I work with, we still haven’t banned conversion therapy. I take full accountability, because I’m a part of a governmental party, so I understand I have more work to do inside my groups.
We still have family members who don’t have full equality over their kids.
Rule of law is being eroded. There’s a feeling of unsafety. I feel it. At the last number of Prides that I’ve attended on the continent of Europe, it is staggering to me in 2025 that there are points on the map that say, “if you are anti all of this, this is where you assemble”.
Two weeks ago in Budapest [at the banned Pride march], there were Nazi and fascist groups gathered; small in number, but there.
We have to find a happy balance of being all the things Pride that I’ve grown up with, but also not forgetting that it is still a protest, because we still don’t have full equality for all letters of our ever-growing rainbow.
I think we’re all sitting here trying to wrap our heads around why things feel worse now. I think that scapegoating only happens when people are in a state of fear.
People are afraid of the world, they’re afraid of news, whether that’s because of social media, or because things are being heightened or whatever.
Everyone around me is worried about the cost of living, about housing, about their futures.
I really see how far-right groups can recruit that way, especially since covid.
Those circumstances have resulted in what we see now in terms of vitriol.
[When] I came out as trans at 17, I was lucky enough to be able to talk about that in the media.
It felt like people were wrapping their heads around the fact that transgender people existed and had a real curiosity in terms of wanting to be understanding. I felt very welcomed.
The last 10 years have seen a lot of changes and a rise in certain dissenting voices.
In my day-to-day life, I’m very lucky. I have great friends and family. But on articles I’ve written and stuff I’ve had [online], I’ve seen comments like, “I’d beat that up if I saw it in a women’s bathroom” or [that I am] trying to corrupt children.
I don’t know how you’re supposed to sit with that and be accepting of it. It’s really hard for any queer people here and we are all encountering situations where we are feeling villainised.
[Some] companies pulled out of Pride sponsorship in Dublin this year, having been there last year. I presume it’s the change in DEI [diversity, equity, and inclusion frameworks in the US], the trickle-down effect.
I don’t want to [support] a company that did that. I think what the marriage referendum did — and the marriage referendum was a wonderful thing — but what it did was legitimise the dissent.
Gay people and queer people had to be very polite and nice to [that cohort of] people who were vicious and rude when we knocked on the doors.
During Pride, I go, OK, it’s Pride month and if there isn’t a sticker, I’m not buying my coffee here. I think we have to look for the support, and support where it is, so that Pride and supporting of Pride affects the balance sheet: if you advocate for the community, there is a reward for doing that.
That’s where I think the far-right are really achieving results, by making companies afraid to support Pride. [I know of] a company that made a Pride post and was targeted on social media very strongly. [We need to] back the companies that support Pride and make it an important thing to do.
Whatever about companies, the thing that fascinates me is libraries.
Last year, I subscribed to a library. I got an email [from it] about a Pride event, and then I got an email saying it wasn’t a Pride event, it was an inclusive event. Anyone could go. But, like …
… don’t say it’s Pride.
Yeah. The people in charge think it’s reasonable to write an email retracting support and saying it’s for everybody. That’s where people are.
Did you ask them, Gearóid, why they did that?
I kicked off for weeks.
But we also still have to educate and that’s exhaustive. The complacency piece, as I mentioned earlier: we have to meet people where they’re at. That’s frustrating and hard, I know.
I can respond and respond, but when you’re getting something from the playbook, [kicking off is] all you can do. You can ring a radio show, but I’m not sure who that serves. It can’t come from the bottom up. It has to come from the top down. It’s institutional.
I would argue it needs to come from the grassroots as well. You have to meet people where they’re at. You need both sides to be able to do that. You mentioned the radio. The radio reaches people in their cars or in businesses, and you’re educating someone who assumes that, in 2015, everything was done.
Sadly, that’s where some people are at, to the point of [that view] also [becoming] institutionalised. Why is LGBTQ+ rights in its entirety getting kicked off the political priority list?
It’s always been important to be very vocal about who I am and what that means to me. I think that generally comes from a place of not having the representation and not really understanding if that representation will be welcomed in a professional environment.
I’m saying this from the context of having worked in a lot of spaces with young people. I remember a very early story I did about a [school] having an “all families” day… the young people could draw pictures of what their families looked like. [The family set-ups were diverse] and people took offence to the inclusion of queer families.
I think they forget that this is the reality for young people. Some young people have queer parents. It’s not a case of trying to interject or brainwash young people, which is one of the biggest arguments people make.
When we did Dancing with the Stars, we were prepped for a big backlash, which never materialised. Neither myself nor Stephen [Vincent] got a single negative comment throughout the whole 12-week run.
It was a real lesson that discrimination is learned. The comment I got from most parents was that they never had to explain to their kids why there were two men dancing together; the kids never asked. I thought that was lovely. We wanted that 10-minute ad, essentially, at 6.30pm on a Sunday, where a father could say to his son, “if you’re gay, that’s OK”. And they didn’t need to look at each other because they were looking at the television. It was a conversation starter.
One of the talking points for trans people is that since 2015, in Ireland, it’s been legal to change your gender without undergoing any medical procedures. And we haven’t had these terrible news stories that everyone seems to say are happening.
I think another fact that would bring all of us hope, is that queer people aren’t going anywhere. We exist, we’re in your workplaces, your families, we’re in schools.
There’s not any law that anyone could change to get rid of us. We’re all here and, thankfully, a lot of us are living proud and out there. I have to ground myself in that a lot of the time.
To go back to what Maria said at the start, people need to find their voice and people need to find their platform now to speak up rather than being complacent and assuming everything’s fine. Because as you said, Laylah, we’re exhausted.
Particularly right now, it is very hard mentally. Right now is the first time in a couple of years where I get very nervous and anxious walking to work.
Two nights ago, a guy ran up to me and pretended to get sick in my face to make his friends laugh. And it’s those moments where [I think], who were his friends? Why are they not saying anything?
It is important, whether you see the smallest thing when you’re out with your group of friends or whether a conversation comes up, if it makes you feel uncomfortable, it’s probably important that you say, “this is making me feel uncomfortable”. And then explain why; use your voice.
Education [is key]. You do not know what you do not know.
I have so many people who stop me and ask, what’s it like being a lesbian in politics? And I say, well, pull up a seat, let me tell you.
That gives a beautiful space for me to learn, most importantly, about the questions. There’s a lot of mistrust, and you can only build trust by communication, education, and face-to-face conversation.
One of the biggest things I love about Pride [month] is that feeling of closeness to LGBT, and sometimes that’s absent throughout the year.
I think that comes from the lack of community resources in different spaces. I’d love to see more community chapters occurring in different contexts.
So definitely in spaces like sports and lifestyle, hobbies, I’d love to see more chapters of LGBT groups.
In my neighbourhood, we have an LGBT book club, which is amazing. We can share resources about what books we’re reading that fit within that theme. So it’s things like that, that feeling of closeness to people.
And again, being able to meet people eye-to-eye and have conversations. Not just queer people, but the intermingling of people.
There’s a Belong To stand on all my tour shows. I think that visibility really matters because it’s incremental and small.
I think the smaller the change, the more solid that change is.
Most of us do drag because it’s an art form and we love people and want to entertain. When I started, people were like, “What are you doing?” Then Drag Race came out and it blew up. My family understood why I do drag because of that show. I’ve seen such an incredible journey.
So for this discourse to start again, we just find it so upsetting. Similar to what Laylah was saying about the comments online — being called a threat to children and a paedophile, because I host Pride shows …
It’s people who don’t know anything about drag reading these articles and comments and believing it. That’s the part I find upsetting. Education in a community is incredibly important. Talk to your friends, your family, talk to people in person.
Don’t fear what’s different. If you do, ask yourself [why] and then have a conversation with somebody.
[I feel] similar in terms of holding the people around you accountable. I think it’s important now, if you are really supportive of queer people, if you love drag, if you love trans people, talk about it to the people around you.
Find out if they have fears around it, if they’re uneducated. Don’t rest on those laurels. That is what I would love people to take away.
We are constantly having to explain ourselves to people. I would love cis and straight people to also do a bit of that heavy lifting for us.
- This feature is an edited version of an hour-long discussion
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